What's the difference between a lawyer and . . .

. . .a  vulture? 
The lawyer gets frequent flyer miles. 

. . . God?

God doesn't think he's a lawyer. 

. . . a trampoline? 
You take off your shoes to jump on a trampoline! 

. . .a boxing referee? 

A boxing referee doesn't get paid more for a longer fight. 

. . . a sperm cell? 
At least the sperm has a 1 in 600 million chance at becoming a human being. 

. . .a gigolo? 
A gigolo only screws one person at a time. 

. . .a vampire? A vampire only sucks blood at night. 

. . . a tick?
The tick drops off after you're dead.